Where do babies come from?
by sofknowseverything
Summary: Crack fic! ""Dean, where do babies come from?" Dean turned his attention to Castiel as soon as he heard the Angel's question. "What?" He must have heard it wrong. Cas hadn't asked him where babies come from that's for sure. "Where do babies come from, Dean?" He repeated, making Dean look at him curiously."


**A/N:** This is for my BFF (**asagiri-sama**) if you like Fairy Tail, please go and check her levy/gajeel story ^^ She was the one to come up with the idea, -since she hasn't seen SPN yet she asked me to write it for her- and **we** hope you like it.

Also, thanks to my awesome Beta **ill-interrogate-the-cat**, please go check her stories! They're awesome! ^^

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Without lifting himself from the couch, Castiel asked the question that had been bugging him.

"Dean, where do babies come from?"

Dean turned his attention to Castiel as soon as he heard the Angel's question.

"What?" He must have heard it wrong. Cas hadn't asked him where babies come from that's for sure.

"Where do babies come from, Dean?" He repeated, making Dean look at him curiously.

"You're an angel, Cas… Don't you know where babies come from? You don't expect me to have the birds and bees talk, do ya?"

Castiel frowned at Dean before answering.

"I thought I knew, but this lady is telling me that a bird carries them." Castiel was so confused. All of his life, he believed that it took a men's semen and a women's egg to make a baby, but maybe he was wrong… Maybe he had it wrong all along.

"Cas, what the hell are you watching?" Dean looked at the television and finally he understood. "Seriously? You're watching a kid's show now?"

Castiel's attention was on the television in front of him once more. His eyes were following the lady on the screen, his ears focusing on what she was saying.

"Dean." Castiel called once more, trying to gain the oldest Winchester's attention. "Why is she saying that babies come from the toothpaste tube?" Dean wasn't sure how to react to that. He had never heard that theory before, and the way Cas was looking at him. He looked so confused. Dean couldn't help him from laughing at his best friends face. "Dean, this is serious! I might have to go to Heaven and explain how babies are formed! We have been wrong! How could we let it happen?"

Castiel sounded so lost. Being an angel and all that made it imperative that he knew everything, but finding through the television that maybe babies come from the _toothpaste tube_? It sounded ridiculous that angels didn't know about it sooner!

Dean kept laughing, harder and harder, as Castiel's frown intensified. Miss Heather –the lady from the TV- started explaining more about babies.

"Miles, are you sure you want a brother?" The kid by her side nodded. "Why not a sister?"

"'Cuz I want a b'other!" The little kid told Heather.

"Alright, big boy, come with me!" Heather grabbed the kids hand and took him to a store. Inside the store were many babies in different shelves. They were organized by 'male' and 'female', skin color, size, eye color… There were so many!

Castiel's mouth was wide open and he didn't know what to think. For once, he thought that maybe he could get a baby and take care of him… If it was as simple as purchasing one, he could do it!

"Dean, which one do you think I should choose?" Castiel asked, his eyes focusing on every baby displayed in the so called store Miss Heather was at.

Dean wasn't even trying. His breathing was uneven and he _couldn't stop laughing_. Some words left Dean's mouth, but no one could understand them… They were too mixed with laughter!

"Dean. This is very serious! I want to purchase a child. And I need your help with it!" Castiel told him, his eyes concerned about the possibility of not being able to choose. Of course Castiel turned to his best friend for help, and what was Dean doing? Laughing. "Should I buy a boy? Maybe a girl?"

Dean tried to calm down. He needed to tell Cas none of it was true… Getting Castiel's hopes up was something wrong. If the guy wanted to raise a kid, Dean should tell him right away it wasn't exactly like that.

"C-Cas" Dean said as he tried to even his breathing. He had nearly gained full control when another fit of laughter came across him. He was so sure he had it all under control. But apparently he did not.

Miss Heather walked around with Miles and after Miles decided he didn't like any of the babies from the store, she took him outside. She had something in her hand and she told Miles: "You see this?" Miles nodded. "You are going to grow you a little brother from the ground. He's going to come from a tree with more babies and you get to choose which one you want, ok?" Miles nodded once more.

"Ok…" He said sheepishly.

Miss Heather placed a little fetus on the ground and covered it with a bit of soil.

Miles waited one minute before he got bored.

"W'y is it takin' so lon'?" He whined. "I wanna b'other now!"

Miss Heather sighed.

"He's just tired… He needs some sleep before you can pick him up and play with him." She explained to him.

Both in Miles and Castiel's head, it made sense. The baby was tired, so it needed rest.

"Oh, ok." Miles agreed and left Miss Heather behind, running down the park.

Miss Heather followed Miles and while they were near rocks, she called the young boy.

"Come here, Miles!" The boy ran up to her and stopped in front of her. "I've heard that sometimes babies can be found under rocks, do you think one of these has your little brother?"

Miles smiled widely and nodded.

"I sure hope so!"

Miss Heather let Miles try to lift a few of the smaller rocks, and when he got near the bigger ones she stopped him.

"Don't you think he would be crushed if he was under such a heavy rock, Miles?"

Miles sighed.

"I guess."

"If you didn't find your brother, maybe is because you're not supposed to have one. Maybe God doesn't want you to have a brother."

"Why would Father not want this little kid to have a baby brother?" Castiel turned to Dean. "I don't understand… Dean, stop laughing! You need to help me understand!" Dean was really trying to focus on anything else besides babies, while Castiel searched for answers all over Dean's face. "I'm confused, Dean… Where do babies come from after all?" Cas asked, his face showing his sorrow. He had been worked up about purchasing one child and taking care of it. And now there was another possibility.

Dean took a sharp intake of oxygen to his lungs before he finally calmed down enough to answer Castiel.

"This is a documentary, Cas!" He explained, trying to ignore the broken hearted look on Castiel's face. "This was made to show us the many things kids believe in! This just happened to be about _where babies come from_! None of that was true! It was all just showing kid's points of view." Castiel looked like he was on the verge of tears. His eyes were shining with wetness and Dean wasn't sure if he could watch Castiel so broken-hearted. It hurt him to see Cas like that. "I'm sorry, Cas… But you can still have kids. Or you can adopt!"

Trying to cheer Castiel up, Dean changed the TV channel to some other channel. He ended up watching a show about a girl who found out she was pregnant.

"See Cas, that's were babies come from…" Dean pointed at the TV screen, and looked at Castiel's face. The Angel was bit better, but he still looked sad. Dean wasn't sure what he could do to make Castiel smile. "Cas…" He called, trying to gain the Angel's attention. "Do you want to see something else?"

Castiel glanced at Dean. Ok, so maybe he was a bit too worked up about having a child to take care of, but Castiel wasn't sure what he was supposed to think. In a matter of minutes he had been so worried about getting a child, and now it wasn't possible. Maybe Dean was right. Maybe he could make one. Or he could adopt.

"What do you think?" Castiel asked, his voice showing just how sad he was.

Dean frowned.

"Uh?"

"Do you think I should have a child?" Castiel asked. "I can have a child with someone else, but I don't want that other person to be a random one… But I don't know that many people. I want my child to have both parents…"

If Dean didn't know better, he would have thought that Cas was saying he could have a child with any other human being.

"And I could have a child with someone I really love, you know? It would be a bit strange, since there would not be necessary any kind of intimacy, but I could have a child. It would be the link between my grace and someone's soul. Like a true love's child."

Dean knew it was weird, but he couldn't help but feel exited over that possibility. Maybe it was a bit girly of him, but being the possibility of a child being born out of true love. It sounded so romantic and adorable.

"But the person I love doesn't love me. So that won't work," Castiel sighed, sinking his head in his hands.

Dean frowned.

"You love someone?" Dean asked, intrigued. Cas turned red embarrassed. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I- Y-You –I… I do like someone…" Castiel ended up admitting.

Dean was feeling extra girly that day, because he felt it was adorable to see the Angel blush.

"Who is it?" Dean asked. His voice sounded jealous, and he didn't exactly understand why. Was it because Cas said he loved someone? _Maybe_… Was he afraid that Cas was gunna leave him for that person? _Maybe_…

"You will not like it," Castiel said, in a low voice.

"Come on, Cas! What do you mean I won't like it?" Dean asked feeling intrigued. "OH MY FUCKING- YOU'RE NOT IN LOVE WITH SAM ARE YOU?"

"What? NO!" Castiel yelled, in response. As Dean kept insisting that if it wasn't Sam there was no problem, Castiel sighed in defeat. "I'm in love with you."

Dean wasn't expecting that… But the thing that made it all even stranger was way his heart started beating faster. He wasn't expecting that to happen, and he never thought he would feel this exited after someone telling him they loved him. Dean was sure that when Lisa said it to him he hadn't felt that happy. Did that mean that Dean cared more about Cas than he ever did with Lisa? _Probably…_

Dean wasn't really capable of hiding the smirk that came into his face. There was no way to hide it.

"If you really want to know, I can show you how babies are made…"


End file.
